single mama

I hear it all the time, I don’t know how you do it on your own. You’re like superwoman or something. I don’t think I could ever do all that you do by myself.

To that I say – you know what, you could!

You could because if you were put in THIS situation, you wouldn’t see any other option either.

Giving up is not an option for me, and I can put money on it not being an option for you either.

If I don’t show up and do the absolute best I can each and every day for my kids, I’m doing a disservice to them.

I will struggle and push through the worst of times and the crappiest of situations with a smile on my face to the best of my ability, or I will die trying.

I signed this contract when I made the commitment to have children. This is my commitment to them. This is my responsibility.

I’m a Mom. This is just what Moms do. We make things work.


Did I expect to be doing this on my own in this way?

No. I doubt anyone ever steps into this role willingly or knowingly.

But, it’s life and we are human.

Shit happens. This is why humans are allowed to drink 🙂

mama drinking red wine

We adjust, we adapt, and we then carry on doing the best we can.

maya angelou quote

Shift happens.

It’s fucking hard and most days are a struggle. It’s like fighting for your life a lot of the time. There are good days and then there are downright shitty days, but I can confidently say that I have survived 100% of those hard days up until now! Yay me!

And you know what happens?

You get stronger.

You grow a thicker skin. You become more resilient and you eventually develop an inner strength unlike any other.

Why?
… because we don’t have a choice. Our kids need us to show up and be strong. Our kids need us to do the best we can.

The strength that comes with the perseverance and determination of a single mother is undeniable, it’s also inevitable when you’re forced to ride it out solo.

And in all honesty, as shitty and hard things are most of the time, I wouldn’t want it to have played out any other way.

Because of the situation I am in, because of my experiences, because of THEM… I am a bigger, better person than I could have ever been otherwise.

Is it hard? Absolutely.

Do I struggle? Every damn day.

Do I get shit done? Fucking right I do.

An ode to the single Mama’s

…. that are out there doing it on their own, hustling as hard as they can day/night just to make ends meet.

… that work 2 jobs and hustle side projects in hopes that one day the weeks won’t be quite so stressful and the money will go just a little bit farther.

… who go without, or at least go with the bare minimum, just so your kids have all that they need and they will never see how bad you’re struggling.

To the Moms that smile and tell everyone they are ‘fine’ because they’re just to disappointed in their situation to let anyone know how they’re really feeling.

Or they just don’t want to let anyone in on their situation. Maintaining the facade is far easier than explaining the reality of things.

… that cry themselves to sleep most nights because they just don’t know how they’re going to make everything work, but somehow manage to get it done every day!

Whose idea of self care is buying the caramel macchiato coffee creamer so she can enjoy just a little taste of luxury in her morning coffee.

Who starts each morning reciting all the things she has to be grateful for so she can greet the day with a heart full of love.

Who spends hours awake each night, tossing and turning, crunching the numbers and trying to make sense of it all and trying to understand how other mothers in situations similar to hers seem to make it work.

Who have gone years without anything new for themselves because they’d rather spend that money on something special for their kids or they need that money to make sure there is food on the table each and every night.

Who survives on coffee alone on the days their kids are not at home.

To the mamas who spends their quiet nights alone pacing the halls, staring into empty beds, counting down the minutes until their kids come home, wishing for things to be easier.

Who dream of the day when they can finally take their kids on a vacation and make unforgettable memories with them.

That work their magical skills to make their income stretch and cover all necessary expenses, even though their income is not nearly enough to support a family on its own.

To the mamas that hustle until their fingers bleed because they want to show their kids that it can be done and that you can achieve your dreams and goals if you just simply put the work in and keep moving forward.

To the moms that persevere and push forward despite the odds being against them, because they want their kids to have a mother they can look up to and be proud of.

We salute YOU, Mama.

Thank you for all that you do.

an ode to the single mamas pinterest